A text I received from a friend contained the phrase “5 amiga cutesy away,” which he said had (somehow) been ‘5 minutes away’ before autocorrect mangled it. (It does an excellent job of being an unpredictable annoyance for something that’s supposed to make typing easier, doesn’t it? My predictive text program currently thinks I write in Spanish and I’ve no idea how to make it stop.) I didn’t ask my friend about the text until the next day, because at the time I could tell what he meant. I wouldn’t’ve asked at all, except I thought “5 amiga cutesy away” sounded interesting. Like the catchphrase for superhero group.
* * * *
“You’ll be fine,” Ann Handsome comforted the sobbing woman. “Let the medics have a look at you.”
While Stunner flew an injured man secured to a backboard over the uneven ground, Gorgeous George and Knockout cleared away large chunks of rubble. My Pretty led the firefighters to people trapped in the collapsed building. When the street was clear, the ambulances had left with the injured, and the firefighters were packing up their trucks, 5 Amiga Cutesy gathered together.
“We’re done here,” Knockout said. “5 Amiga Cutesy… away!”
* * * *
…Anyway, my point is that I didn’t have to think about what he meant. I’ve known him for years, and we’re fairly good communicators. He even accused me of infecting him with my speech patterns, which I find all kinds of entertaining. It’s as if my brain waves alter his synapses, because I hadn’t seen him in months, and had only spent 5 hours in his presence at that point.
I think he’s overreacting just a tad. Don’t you find yourself talking like the people you spend time with?
Another long-term friend and I have a terrible time communicating through texts, like two people who’re both slightly deaf and refuse to use hearing aids. There’s a lot of “What?” “Huh?” and “I didn’t get that.” Then there’s the texts that someone thinks they understand, and respond to, and then the other person has to say “No, wait. What? Oh, you thought I meant that I was outside your door, but I’m in fact just now leaving my house. Please don’t stand outside and wait for me, it’s a 25-minute drive.”
I really can’t say why this happens. It just does, despite my best efforts to be clear. Because I do edit text messages before I send them. I just wish I could draw, because 5 Amiga Cutesy would have the most fashionable superhero costumes imaginable. Maybe some ruffles, or floral prints, or lace…