This 8 sentence blog hop is hosted by The Weekend Writing Warriors. (Click the link for the list of participants, or rules if you want to join!)

Last lines: Becca has just been fired, hears Irving got the promotion she wanted, just before Irving sees her at her partially emptied desk. Irving: “Oh.”

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“How the hell did you get the job?” Becca demanded.

“Becca, don’t get excited. You never did any more work than you had to; you can’t be surprised.”

That bastard Irving! She put up with his stupid sense of humor, the way he talked on and on about nothing, and his annoying fidgeting! How could he say that about her? She kicked over his trashcan, spilling wads of paper on the floor.

*   *   *   *   *   *

NOTE: I’m doing NaNoWriMo this month, so expect my replies to your comments to be a little slow, but I’ll get to you, promise.

“Lily Wasn’t There” is a short story I can’t quite get right. I’m hoping the feedback from WeWriWa will help.

Becca’s life hasn’t gone how she planned. Stuck in an accounting job she despises, she scrapes by with a paycheck that doesn’t buy her half of what she deserves. She wants to find a man before she’s thirty, get married, and never work another day in her life. While at work, she people-watches, and one particular coworker is often the focus of her attention–Lily. Lily is everything Becca hates–buttoned-up, bland, and overly dedicated to her job–or so Becca thinks.

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About Caitlin Stern

I have a MA in English, and have so many fantasy/urban fantasy WIPs it's not even funny. I'm an avid reader of science fiction, fantasy, mystery, romance, biography, fiction, and anything else that catches my interest. I collect books, and bookmarks I find that are visually appealing and useful.

22 responses »

  1. S.J. Maylee says:

    I’ve wanted to kick over someone’s trash can before. I bet that felt good. Childish I know, but I would love to see the look on his face. 🙂

  2. We want to like the heroine-even love her so let’s get to know what makes her so bitter.

    • caitlinstern says:

      This was an experiment short story, so if you don’t have some pity for Becca by now, you never will. (I do know a great deal more about her than ended up in the story.)

      It’s probably not publishable for that reason, I agree. But it was fun to write. 🙂

  3. Gemma Parkes says:

    Temper temper Becca! Anger management courses are available…

  4. Sarah Cass says:

    Oh my, she is more childish than I ever imagined…bitter, angry woman with such skewed perceptions!!

    • caitlinstern says:

      That was the last straw–all her debts and little disappointments, being fired, and then finding out a man she despises got the promotion she wanted.

      It’s enough to make any childish, bitter, angry woman (you got her spot on) snap.

  5. He’s telling her the truth she doesn’t want to hear all right. I’m with Charmaine – are we going to have some insights into Becca? Another good snippet…

  6. Well now, I can definitely relate to her. Kicking inanimate objects when frustrated happens to be a specialty of mine.

  7. Millie Burns says:

    Well, I certainly don’t like her, and never have : ) I’m actually laughing a little at her childish antics which are spot on with how you’ve portrayed her so far : )

  8. Sounds like Irving has her number.

  9. Sarah W says:

    There’s the mature, reasonable Becca we all know and . . . know. 😀

  10. Carrie-Anne says:

    Who hasn’t been tempted to do something like that after being laid off or fired?

  11. And Becca’s misery continues. She better gets out of here fast.

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