This 8 sentence blog hop is hosted by The Weekend Writing Warriors. (Click the link for the list of participants, or rules if you want to join!)

“Jabberwock Keys” is a complete just-for-fun short story that could use some polishing. A man has entered a magic shop, looking for a monster guard for his treasures–the shopkeeper recommends a Jabberwock, plays a summoning on a silver flute, and something enormous comes out of the trees.

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The Jabberwock towered above them, long neck carrying its head up high, baring its sharp teeth and deadly claws.

“This is Daisy,” the shopkeeper said, “Daisy, this is Magnus the Magnificent, who needs a guardian.”

The Jabberwock burbled, stomping closer and lowering her enormous head to study the sorcerer, tipping her head to peer at him from one crimson eye, and then the other. Finally, she nodded, and settled down on the grass, wrapping her tail neatly around herself.

“Daisy will work for you,” the shopkeeper handed Magnus the silver flute, “Use this to summon her. And don’t forget to pay her–I’m not responsible for her actions if you don’t.”

Magnus stared at the mountain of muscle and sharp edges curled up outside the shop. “Yes, I don’t imagine I’ll be doing that, thank you.”

*    *    *

Due to NaNoWriMo, I’ll probably be a little slower than usual, but I still value your feedback, frazzled as I am!

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About Caitlin Stern

I have a MA in English, and have so many fantasy/urban fantasy WIPs it's not even funny. I'm an avid reader of science fiction, fantasy, mystery, romance, biography, fiction, and anything else that catches my interest. I collect books, and bookmarks I find that are visually appealing and useful.

35 responses »

  1. Daisy! Hahaha! And I love how she/he? curls up like a kitty-cat. Just don’t forget the paycheck! Loving this.

    • caitlinstern says:

      Daisy is a she–I cut a sentence that said so, and didn’t notice it wasn’t elsewhere.

      It’s very important to pay your enormous monster promptly. Or it could cost you an arm and a leg.

  2. Gemma Parkes says:

    Daisy the jabberwock! Priceless! Entertaining and visual snippet!

  3. Wonderful! I love this story! Daisy is just fabulous.
    My only suggestion would be to tweak your use of head. You have it twice in short succession. Good luck with NaNo.

  4. Eleri Stone says:

    Great setup:) Don’t forget to pay her…. What kind of currency do you use to pay a Jabberwock, I wonder.

  5. Alexis Duran says:

    The name Daisy made me laugh. I have a wonderful picture of her in my mind. Great snippet.

  6. Oh, this is too wonderful and perfect. I’m already smitten with Daisy! whatever he has that needs guarding better be something fantabulous…excellent excerpt!

  7. Frank Fisher says:

    The name Daisy is great, though it sounds like an euphemism based on the descriptions. That’s just my thoughts. I’m getting to know the characters more, and I’m impressed.

  8. Hello Caitlin, I really like the tone you take with this. Of course, one can walk into a story and get a magical Jabberwocky to guard your store. Great description and hint of problems with the comment on paying. Pay with what??? Looking forward to more.

    • caitlinstern says:

      It’s not a problem to pay your jabberwock, so long as you do it promptly. Forget to pay them on time, and they may repossess something you value–like your foot. All those teeth aren’t for show!

  9. Carrie-Anne says:

    I love this fantasy world you’ve created. It sounds like a fun story.

  10. Caitlin, you’ve created a story to LOVE! Delicous, funny and outrageous. Thanks for a huge laugh.

  11. chellecordero says:

    the name Daisy and the comment “don’t forget to pay her” made me think of the adage about a woman scorned. Very enchanting. I have a feeling Daisy the Jabberwock will do the job just fine. Great 8

    • caitlinstern says:

      Pretty much any meat-eating monster you pay to guard your treasure needs to be paid promptly, I think–male or female.

      But Daisy definitely knows how to stand up for herself!

  12. I like Daisy. Sounds like a very interesting monster.

  13. And what do you pay a jabberwok with?

  14. Sarah W says:

    Burbling! Awesome!

    Do you feed her snicker-snacks? 😀

  15. Evelyn Jules says:

    Cracked up at the name Daisy. I’d be paying her double just to ensure she stays on my good side. lol. Great work and best of luck with NaNo! 🙂

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